Ok, life has thrown me a few punches over the last year, I got laid off from my job.  Im on my own trying to become an independent photographer shooting weddings and selling my photography as art.  Its hard.  You truly need a promoter as an artist and I cant afford one and my personality is just the opposite of a promoter.  Im am stuck inside a world of negative and unworthiness in my head.  I do not know if it is depression, a feeling of ignorance because of my school grades, addiction,  ADD which I was diagnosed in 11th grade with or an overall reaction to my parents at my shortcomings as I was growing up.  I have never been able to narrow all the factors down to who I am today as a human being.  I have neglected this blog for quite awhile and now realize I need to keep coming back here to vent.